What Comes to Mind

Fixeritis

Wed, 01 May 2013 14:29:36 -0400

I’m a “fixer”. It’s something I have struggled with all my life. If something is wrong or broken I have to try and fix it. My parents used to call me the “problem solver” of the family. Not because I actually solved the problems but because I was always attempting to.

I’m filled with this urgent feeling to fix everything. But when I can’t I am forced to deal with an inner turmoil. But the inner turmoil isn’t something I can fix either; therefore it’s just a vicious circle underlying with feelings of failure. Naturally… this is discouraging. So I run. I run from the situation. I pretend it isn’t there. And once again, naturally… this can be an issue.

I didn’t become aware of this until recently when I found myself running from people. People I love. People who are sick. People who are heartbroken. People who are hurting. People who I can’t “fix”. I can’t help them. And honestly, I don’t know how to cope with that.

It turns out 2 Corinthians holds something very valuable for me.

Chapter 1

³Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, ⁴who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. ⁵For just as we share abundantly in the sufferings of Christ, so also our comfort abounds through Christ. ⁶If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer. ⁷And our hope for you is firm, because we know that just as you share in our sufferings, so also you share in our comfort.

It turns out that maybe I can’t fix all the problems. But you know what? I can comfort. I have a Father of COMPASSION, the God of COMFORT. I know him, and I know what he has done for me. He died on the cross for my sins, HE WAS MY SIN OFFERING!!! That is the most compassionate thing anyone will EVER do for me. And I find comfort in Christ’s sacrifice. This passage helps me understand that because I have comfort in him I can help comfort others. Will there be struggles? Yes. Will we suffer? Yes. But we will have comfort.

Not only can I comfort but I can intercede. Too many times I have forgotten I have the ability to intercede and pray for others. Especially the hurt, the heartbroken, the people I love who I cannot help. I forget that.

Continuing with that passage…

⁸We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers and sisters, about the troubles we experienced in the province of Asia. We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired of life itself. ⁹Indeed, we felt we had received the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead. ¹⁰He has delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us again. On him we have set our hope that he will continue to deliver us, ¹¹as you help us by your prayers. Then many will give thanks on our behalf for the gracious favor granted us in answer to the prayers of many.

Even Paul who was in despair knew that God would deliver him; he knew that he could not rely on himself but must rely on God. He set his hope on God! Just like we must set our hope on God and encourage others to set their hope on him as well! But it is not just that… Notice how he knew their prayers for him helped! He was grateful that they interceded on his behalf. And he knew that God had heard their prayers for his struggles.

My challenge is this: If you have “fixeritis” you will know we are not called to fix it all the time. But we are called to be there, to tell others of the comfort we have in Jesus Christ. Remember we can help. God will hear our prayers for them. Don’t let yourself forget you have the power of intercession. Don’t let yourself be discouraged by the inability to problem solve all the hurt in this world but be encouraged by the power of God and the sacrifice of Jesus that remind us these troubles are temporary and our despair is not eternal.

After a While by Veronica A. Shoffstall

Tue, 19 Mar 2013 11:12:07 -0400

After a While

After a while you learn
The subtle difference between
Holding a hand and chaining a soul
And you learn that love doesn’t mean leaning
And company doesn’t always mean security.

And you begin to learn
That kisses aren’t contracts
And presents aren’t promises
And you begin to accept your defeats
With your head up and your eyes ahead
With the grace of a woman
Not the grief of a child

And you learn
To build all your roads on today
Because tomorrow’s ground is
Too uncertain for plans
And futures have a way
Of falling down in mid flight

After a while you learn
That even sunshine burns if you get too much
So you plant your own garden
And decorate your own soul
Instead of waiting
For someone to bring you flowers

And you learn
That you really can endure
That you are really strong
And you really do have worth
And you learn and you learn
With every good bye you learn.

Veronica A. Shoffstall

Everchanging

Thu, 14 Mar 2013 12:04:19 -0400

mkrahn:

We are made up of bits and pieces of everything we’ve ever done and everyone we’ve ever met. We lose ourselves in places, we find ourselves somewere else. We give a part of ourselves away to each person we let in our lives. The wonderful thing about this is that they give us something back, and sometimes what we take away is greater than what we started with in the first place. A new perspective. A new attitude. A completley new life.

-Mary Krahn

The Greatest Email I Ever Received

Fri, 21 Dec 2012 09:58:56 -0500

Safe to say my boss is awesome… This is what I came into work to this morning…

Well, today is Dec 21. According to the Mayan Calendar the world is supposed to come to a end today.

Yesterday I apparently won 900 million in the European lottery according to the email I received, they should be delivering my money and second I suppose.

Assuming the Mayan’s is correct. I just wanted to say thank you to each one of you before the world ends later today and let you know that timing SUCKS because I had just decided when I received that email yesterday on my flight home that next week I was going to give each one of you 10 million dollars (10,000,000.00) in cash from me for all your hard work! Payable next week, but since the world ends today of course!

…..I guess that was a bad plan since the world will end today

In the case that the world DOES NOT end today…….please disregard this message. ;-) (hey you can always say you almost had 10 million dollars once and things just “did not work out” ) and see then below.

——

On behalf of myself personally and the entire federation. I am grateful to know each and every one of you and thank you for your service, support, friendship and leadership.

I hope each and every one of you have a very Merry Christmas and a happy holiday season with your families.

Yours In Service,

Robert Cartlidge

Ambition

Thu, 06 Dec 2012 23:00:00 -0500

Today someone said to me, “So… You’re 20 years old and you have no ambition?” This was after I told them that I had no particular job I wanted to do in life. But the saddest part is that this has happened to me quite a few times. And this really got me thinking… Is this what the world has come to? That we are expected to have the American dream and succeed at a skill in life that we choose? “Oh and while we’re at it lets choose something that is going to make us a lot of money!” No. No. No. This is not what life is about! How dare people say I have no ambition. I truely have ambition. It’s just not in reguards to things this world expects so others do not view it in the same light.

Let me share the synonyms for ambition and let you have a little insight to what I feel I want out of my life…

Synonyms: appetite, ardor, aspiration, avidity, craving, desire, drive, eagerness, earnestness, emulation, energy, enterprise, enthusiasm, fire in belly, get up and go, hankering, hope, hunger, initiative, itch, keenness, longing, love, lust, moxie, passion, pretension, push, right stuff, spirit, striving, thirst, vigor, yearning, and zeal.

I have an APPETITE for adventure.
I ASPIRE to make a difference for the Kingdom of God.
I have a DESIRE to travel, to learn, and to love God more everyday.
I have a DRIVE to tell others about what Jesus has done for us.
I have ENTHUSIASM when spending time with people I love.
I have HOPE for this world.
I have HUNGER… For good food ;)
I have a LONGING to embrace what God has planned for me.
I have a PASSION for working with youth.
And I have the SPIRIT of the living God inside of me!

How dare people tell me that I don’t have ambition!

It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas

Mon, 26 Nov 2012 15:55:00 -0500

Thanksgiving was wonderful! Filled with delicious food, games, laughs, redneck sledding, and fellowship with friends and family!

Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays for those reasons; but Christmas is very similar to me. They are both a time where we are thankful and aware of how blessed we are. Thanksgiving a time where we take a special time to celebrate a multitude of different blessings from God, Christmas is a time where we do the same… but it’s also a special season where we celebrate the ultimate and most wonderful blessing He ever gave us… The birth of our Savior, Jesus Christ.

There is just something overwhelmingly wonderful about the Christmas season.

I’m just so excited!

I’m excited to celebrate and remember the birth of Jesus with all the believers around the world!

I’m excited for the Christmas decorations, even if I don’t get to experience much decorating myself!

I’m excited for the baking of special deserts that we only make once a year.

I’m excited about getting to watch an array of Christmas movies ranging from White Christmas to Elf!

I’m excited for all of the classic cartoon shows that will be on! Like Frosty the Snowman, Rudolf, How the Grinch Stole Christmas, Charlie Brown’s Christmas, and so on…!!!

I’m excited for hot chocolate and driving around looking at the Christmas lights.

I’m excited for cold weather and the smell of wood burning.

I’m excited to make gingerbread houses and go ice skating!

I’m excited to hear Christmas music on the radio.

And most of all I’m excited that in just a few weeks I will be curled up on my Daddy’s lap like I’m 10 years old instead of 20.

Getting to see my family and celebrate Christmas with them is something that I am still extremely grateful for. But as I continue to grow older I know that it isn’t always going to be like this. And while that makes me sad, it also brings me joy because I know there are exciting changes for my future, even if I don’t know what they are yet.

Jonah 1

Tue, 13 Nov 2012 14:18:00 -0500

At the girls retreat we had a few weeks back we read and talked about Jonah but I decided I’m going post some of what I said and a little more that I didn’t get out. Also I’ll probably post on each chapter. But for now just open the Bible app on your phone or bust out the Word of God to brush up on the story of Jonah chapter 1.

….

We see that Jonah is a servant of God and he was called to serve in Nineveh, but he did not want to.

So Jonah basically ran from God after God told him he wanted him to go. Jonah was headed for Tarshish because he did not like the people in Nineveh and he did not want them to repent and be saved because he knew that was what was going to happen. So he gets on a boat and he goes down below deck to sleep and then captain runs down there like, “What are you doing?! Sleeping? How can you sleep when we are all about to die from this violent storm?! We need you to pray to your God!” The other men on the ship had other Gods they were calling out to probably and it wasn’t working… duh…

Question (Vs 3): Do you guys ever run away from the Lord? Flee from what he has planned for you because you’re afraid of it? Like choosing not to share the gospel with someone or speak out about your faith because you are afraid of what others will think? …Or maybe deep down you don’t believe they deserve to hear the gospel, because that’s what Jonah believed about Nineveh.

…So inevitably they determine through casting a lot that it is Jonah’s fault that the storm had come. And he proclaims who he is and who his God is. That totally blew those guys mind.

Even if we do not follow Gods direction he can still be glorified through us. That is how amazing and powerful he is. Even though Jonah was ignoring God and wasn’t going to speak at Nineveh he still had an opportunity to share who and how amazing his God is and because of that they feared the Lord (sacrificed and made vows).

Side Note (Vs 13): I don’t know why anyone would try to continue to run from God, that is silly of us. He is always going to win!

So because Jonah ultimately proclaimed who God was and that he was Lord and that he would calm the storm if Jonah was thrown out of the boat then after that actually happened the men realized that his God was the God of all and how powerful he was and they “offered sacrifice to the Lord and made vows to him.” That is powerful! To see that if we would just proclaim the name of God that many people would be saved. Imagine how much a difference we would make if we would just proclaim the name of the LORD, as his servants that is one thing we are called to do.

I think sometimes in our lives we think we can out smart God or that it would be better to follow our own will rather than his. And to be honest sometimes we need to stop being selfish about whether or not Gods will is going to be the most wonderful/comfortable/enjoyable way to live. But what if we realized that God has a plan for the world? And that is for everyone to be saved! Including the people that we don’t want to talk to, just like Jonah did not want to talk to the people of Nineveh. What about all the people in our lives that we encounter who just need to hear about who God is and what he has done for us through Jesus Christ.

We are all called to be servants of God. Jonah was a servant of God. He was sent by God to do Gods will. But just like many servants he thought he had a better idea of what he could be doing with his time. God called him to go to a very sinful town, but he knew that if the town heard the word of God preached and if they repented they would be saved and become a Holy people. So Jonah ran away because he did not want that, he was being selfish. And as servants of God we do the same thing sometimes… We choose to be selfish rather than just submit to God because we don’t realize he has a greater plan for the world than we could ever imagine.

Check It Out

Mon, 12 Nov 2012 16:48:07 -0500

So I decided since I like sharing so many worship songs I would just make a blog dedicated to sharing a worship song each day I would just post it here so I can keep track and such… enjoy! http://yourdailyworshipsong.tumblr.com/

The Adventures of Leah and Paige

Mon, 22 Oct 2012 22:08:00 -0400

So this whole Rocky Mountain trip was kind of amazing. And by “kind of amazing” I mean… “SERIOUSLY SPECTACULAR!” I am in awe of God and the scenery which he created and provided for us.

Me and Paige planned on going and having a good time but I don’t think either one of us truly realized how great it was going to be and how much we both needed it. We were indeed blessed by God to be able to go on this trip and we saw his provisions and blessings many different times!

Here are some of the highlights…

Car Ride: Music. Laughs. And a whole lot of dust. It also involved a very inconsistent driver whom we nicknamed Brian. Turns out his real name was Wesley… funny story… anyways… Oh and making peanut butter sandwiches in the back seat. LIKE A BOSS.

So we got to Denver to stay with my Aunt and Uncle who live there. (Which we were very grateful that they let us stay there and were so welcoming!) Then Friday morning we rolled out and headed for some higher elevations!

Friday: Nymph Lake, Dream Lake, Emerald Lake, and Lake Haiyaha. 5.8 Miles and completely worth it! We saw so many amazing sites and the view was magical. The trail to Lake Haiyaha was my favorite part of the first day because we had to back track a little on the trail we first took and then branch off to that hike which was definitely different terrain. The lady that we had talked to about hiking told us that we would have to find a big tree and then go around a boulder. Inevitably though we just ended up not seeing the trail and just wandering over a bunch of boulders. But that was pretty fun.

At some point during the hike on the first day I said “Look at that boulder!” which led to Paige saying, “Whats that off of???? OH! Shrek! ‘Look at that boulder! That’s a NICE boulder!’” …Which then led to both of us saying that numerous times throughout the hikes on both days. But seriously, there were some seriously nice boulders!

…..unfinished.

Most Recent Update Of My Bucket List

Sat, 06 Oct 2012 19:23:00 -0400

I’ve still got a long ways to go!

Milestones that I don’t really count…

1. Graduate high school May 17, 2010!!

2. Go to college Freshman year: Aug 2010 - May 2011

3. Get a steady job June 18, 2012

4. Get married

5. Have a family

Now lets be serious…

1. Go on a road trip with friends October 18-21, 2012 With Paige Klinger

2. Go to a Kenny Chesney concert April 2, 2011 With Kayla and Aprille

3. Visit Washington D.C. March 15, 2011 With Mom and Bryce!

4. Backpack through Europe

5. Go on a mission trip, and then as many as I can Spring Break 2012 with NEBC

6. Go to a exact place named in the Bible

7. Walk on the black sand beach in Hawaii

8. Touch The Great Coral Reef

9. To be remembered from something special that I did, even if its just by one person: Thank you Bethany, “You will always be remmber by me for being the best of friends no matter what always being honest, opptimistic and one of the best person in my life that i know i could not EVER do without!!!! (here i go crying again!) i love you dear.”

10. Sit on a roof

11. Solve a Rubik’s Cube

12. Go sky diving

13. Go on a gondola with my lover

14. Fly in a Hot Air Baloon

15. Do that thing in A Walk to Remember when she’s “in two places at once”

16. Go Parasailing

17. Visit Leah, Georgia and Mott, North Dakota

18. Blow something up

19. Fly a kite Thank you Hillary!! March 24, 2010

20. Drink Coffee in Seattle

21. Go skinny dipping in the summer

22. Jump off a swing backward— Epic Fail May 1, 2010

23. See a Disney Broadway musical

24. Own something over 100 years old

25. Give someone a caterpillar kiss

26. Drive 100 MPH May 29, 2012 With Bryce

27. Change a tire by myself

28. Run a marathon

29. Live in Australia

30. Get a New Years Eve kiss

31. Help release baby sea turtles

32. Win something on the radio

33. Tango

34. Go to a Ball

35. Ride a carnival ride (maybe, I’m scared to death of them) September 17, 2011 The Zipper with Mary Krahn!

36. Learn the Thriller dance

37. Carve my name in a tree With Michael Degan in Ponca City

38. Ride on a motorcycle

39. Do a Cartwheel Waiting for documentation…and I dont know what day it was.

40. Go mudding

41. Drive a tractor

42. Plant a whole acre of daisies

43. Go bunee jumping

44. Finish a cross word in pen

45. Peel an apple and keep the peel in one piece August 18, 2010

46. Get a pair of TOMS Thanks Mom!! May 17, 2010

47. Have a song written for me, even if its as a joke

48. Own a real hammock that you tie to trees April 26, 2010

49. Go to Cafe du Monde in New Orleans

50. Walk on a pier June 2012 With Mary Krahn in Florida

51. Go to one of the Olympics

52. Make a tie die shirt Thank you Mary!! and Katlyn and Kayla and Whitney! August 5, 2010

53. Own a telescope

54. Climb a tree - With Kayla! July 9, 2010

55. Go on a giant zipline

56. Meet a legit Elvis impersonator

57. Take a yoga class

58. Go legitimately camping and hiking somewhere beautiful

59:Get ice cream from an ice cream truck With Mary and Lindsey! September 25, 2010

60: Find out how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop With Whitney Gladd! May 21, 2011

61. Ride a cow

62. Attend a Monster Truck Ralley July 23, 2011 Thank you Michael!

63. Go to a Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade

64. Tie Die a Canvas and paint it with black and white June 29, 2011

65. Get a tattoo September 11, 2012 With Nissi McClung

66. Build a GIGANTIC snow man

67. Meet someone who loves OneRepublic as much as I do (Not at a concert)

68. Attend Mardi Gras

69. Do a pull-up

70. See the Grand Canyon

71. Compete in a Bass Fishing Tournament

Somewhere Over the Rainbow

Thu, 27 Sep 2012 15:23:52 -0400

That is currently the song playing. And the one before that it was “Don’t Worry, Be Happy”… I really love that song.

And those songs are playing on the Mumford & Sons Pandora channel… and we all know how amazing they are!

And quite frankly if you don’t know, please get on YouTube and educate yourself on what good music is.

So I feel like my life has gone absolutely nuts lately. I’m busy pretty much everyday. That almost makes me sad because I feel like I have no time to work out, and I enjoy working out. But now I’m at the point where I will have to deprive myself of sleep to work out. Now that is a dilemma…

So anyways, I want some adventure. I want to travel. I want to drink some hot tea. I want to lay in my hammock.

Wouldn’t it be lovely if I could do all of those things at once? However I’m sure drinking hot tea while reclining in my hammock could be a little sketchy.

So as usually I miss my family. Surprise, surprise. Not really though…I call it being “family sick” because we don’t really have a home where we have all grown up in together anymore so I find “home sick” to be inapplicable.

But guess what? Tonight is “family dinner” which is more or less just a gathering of people who are cousins (me) in-laws, and friends. And it’s awesome, because we all love each other and we laugh together and have a good time eating the amazing food my aunt Lesa cooks. But I’m also sad because Nissi is not going to be at there :( because she left. But that’s okay too because she is out changing the world and proclaiming the Word of God with a heart for worship. She’s pretty amazing.

Oh! Also I really want a dog. My very own dog whom I can call mine, and it’s name will be Charlie. Boy or girl… the name will be Charlie. I would prefer a mid-sized mixed breed because personally I think those are some of the cutest. But the chance of me getting a dog anytime within the next few years is slim-none.

GUESS WHAT SONG JUST CAME ON!!!! Revelation Song by Kari Jobe… I seriously adore this song. God is so good!

So I’ve come to the point where I am just literally going with the flow of my life. I seriously have no genuine plans made for the near future… or far future.

But that’s okay too.

Really though, just everything in life is okay, I think it’s contentment. Is this what contentment and joy feel like? Because I’m pretty sure it is and it’s truly amazing. Kind of indescribably. How did I get here? Idk, I suppose by the wonderful grace of our Heavenly Father. That is just so amazing!!

So here I am. Sitting at work. Waiting for it to be Friday, and then Monday. Because that’s when things are about to take off. But all the while I’m content, and joyful, and thankful, and full (because I just ate some leftover calzone).

That’s all folks.

Life Is Beautiful: Changes..

Mon, 24 Sep 2012 16:28:10 -0400

Life Is Beautiful: Changes..:

mkrahn:

I have recently really come to terms with how much I have fallen away from everything I once held precious and dear to me. I was stressed out because I kept trying to control and manipulate my future and figure it all out on my own instead of trusting God with my whole heart and allowing his will…

I love this poem very much.

Thu, 23 Aug 2012 09:50:00 -0400

“Break Free Little Girl”

It makes so much sense to want to run,

to flee from the shackles and sprint towards the sun.

It makes so much sense to attempt to fly,

though conformity grounds us each time we try.

It makes so much sense to duck and hide,

serenity and solitude appeal side by side.

It makes so much sense to shed all our tears,

but you can’t if you’re drowned in judgmental sneers.

Break free little girl,

and sprint towards the sun.

Strap on your wings,

and take off with a run.

Dip through the darkness,

and find your own place.

Let your sewn-up tears,

pour down your face.

Let your running and flying

break through the chains.

Let your lovely emotions

cut through the pain.

Let your hair wisp sharply

and laugh, little girl.

Do a dance of liberation

your canvas—the world.

So paint your own future,

determine your fate.

Cut your own path,

and lose your way.

Then find yourself again,

when you know you aren’t lost.

And hold your head high,

no matter the cost.

Break free little girl,

and dance for the moon.

As it gazes upon you,

and shadows the gloom.

Sing a song of triumph,

in your darkest day.

Since you know, little girl

that you found your own way.

Now you stand at a crossroad,

with two paths at hand.

One a life of selflessness,

certainty, and plan.

The other a winding

trail of ambiguity,

with inhibition trodden on

beside dependency.

Along the path you choose

lies another divide,

Two courses you may take

to the friends you may find.

One a path of integrity,

faithfulness, and trust.

The other of obstruction,

deceit, and lust.

Break free little girl

and travel these paths.

If you find you’re misguided,

turn around and backtrack.

Slash the shrubs that hinder

your journey’s progress,

and pave the course you choose

with loud confidence.

Live your life to the fullest

and hold your friends near.

Cherish your family,

for whom you owe all your years.

Let your eyes gleam with pride

that swells from your soul,

And embrace all the love

that your heart soon shall dole.

When faced with adversity,

run little girl.

To your deepest of thoughts

in your very own world.

Knead your faith for the answers

to life’s hardest angst,

and hold dear to the morals

you have leaned strong against.

Stand high on your platform

of character and will.

Think always with your soul,

for your ego gasps ill.

Remain humble and retire

to your childish awe.

Find excitement and passion

in everything small.

Break free little girl

and dance for the moon.

As it gazes upon you,

and shadows the gloom.

Sing a song of triumph,

in your darkest day.

Since you know, little girl

you will pave your own way.

–Mo Isom, 2007

The Past Three Months

Mon, 13 Aug 2012 23:46:00 -0400

The end of May, June, July, and beginning of August have been a roller-coaster. I have had more going on in the past three months than I have at almost any other time in my life. I have driven eight hours to spend 5 days with my family, been to church camp, a vacation to Florida with my best friend Mary, to Arkansas for a 5 day fishing tournament for work and then just today I got back from another tournament that we had in Georgia where I was gone for a week. I have been to Texas, New Mexico, Arkansas, Tennessee, Mississippi, Alabama, and Georgia in a matter of three months! I started a full time job in June where I work 8 hours a day five days a week, that makes me feel like a grown up. And the same day that I started that job I also started my two online summer classes that led me to finishing my Associates degree finally a few weeks ago. Also last Wednesday I celebrated my 20th birthday! And I am pleased to say that while this summer has been absolutely crazy, exciting, stressful, and spectacular… it has been one of the biggest blessings of my life.

I can not begin to describe how thankful I am to have a God who loves me and who forgives me when I don’t deserve it. Who sent his son for my salvation that I may have faith in him and strive to live a life devoted to him and submit to his will and remember his provisions for my life are far beyond what I will ever comprehend. I am thankful for my church family and for my friends who are always there when I need to call or talk. Or just to hang out and have a good time. Especially Cheyenne, Kyle, and Larry when we get to have our movie nights! I am thankful for my cousins who have taken me in as one of their own and love me and make me laugh until my stomach hurts and I am crying and can no longer breathe like a normal person. I am thankful for my grandparents who never care when I come over and just want to be old and play a couple rounds of Phase10. I am thankful for my MawMaw who blesses me far more than anyone will ever understand. Without that woman I would be lost. People say that she is lucky to have me because I take care of her, and while that is true. I am also lucky to have her, because without her I would be a wreck everyday. She keeps me grounded and helps me to remember my priorities. I am also thankful for the time that I got to spend with my little brother this summer. It wasn’t a lot but we had a great time. Staying up late and talking about life. Or jamming out to our favorite country music in the car. Even when we just sit and he tells me ridiculous stories until I can no longer control my laughter (That seems to happen a lot). But during all this time I have an ache in my heart for missing my whole family. I miss my mommy and daddy and big brother Zac who I haven’t seen in forever. I miss coming downstairs and crawling into my dads lap to watch a movie, just because! I miss being a family and having that support and sitting around the table talking and laughing and especially having my favorite pot roast birthday dinner followed up with magic cookie bar! But even though I miss them and I am sad sometimes, I am so so sooooo grateful for all of the friends and family I have in Ponca and other areas who are so supportive and helpful and have taken me in. I just feel overwhelming love and gratitude for everyone.

Now that my crazy summer has basically come to a close I have no idea where my next adventure will be to. I have no idea what I am doing with my life. And I have no idea where I will be in a year from now.

But one thing I do know is that God has a plan for my life and he will continue to open and close doors to lead me where he wants me to go. And he will continue to provide for me!

Have faith in Jesus. Let him have your life.

Thu, 09 Aug 2012 23:58:00 -0400

I haven’t had a blog post in a really long time but I’ve been thinking a lot about Faith again, which is very similar to my last post but I thought I might hit the topic again.

I think we need to go back to how simple the Gospel is. To how simple having faith is. Too often we get caught up in trying to make Christianity complicated, like somehow that elevates the importance of what Jesus did. But lets be honest, most of the time when people are truly touched by the message of Jesus Christ they don’t know/care about the trinity or all of the old testament theology,and so on, they just know about the love of Jesus. All they know is that a holy and righteous man was sent by a God who loves them, and that man DIED and ROSE back to life. For them. Because he loves them. And he loves you. And he loves me. And that’s what this is about! The love of Jesus bring a revolution to this world and us putting our FAITH in him! Thus living out this glorious revolution of salvation and love because of that faith!

So lets go back to the basics and talk about Faith.

One of my favorite things that Jesus says is, “You of little faith!” Every time I read or hear those words it pierces my heart because often times when I hear that I am convicted that I have had little faith. But lets look at a story where a woman had way more than a little faith.

Mark 5. This is one of my favorite stories of a very simple example of someone having faith in Jesus.

²¹When Jesus had again crossed over by boat to the other side of the lake, a large crowd gathered around him while he was by the lake. ²²Then one of the synagogue leaders, named Jairus, came, and when he saw Jesus, he fell at his feet. ²³He pleaded earnestly with him, “My little daughter is dying. Please come and put your hands on her so that she will be healed and live.” ²⁴So Jesus went with him.

A large crowd followed and PRESSED around him. ²⁵And a woman was there who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years. ²⁶She had suffered a great deal under the care of many doctors and had spent all she had, yet instead of getting better she grew worse. ²⁷When she heard about Jesus, she came up behind him in the crowd and TOUCHED his cloak, ²⁸because she thought, “If I just touch his clothes, I will be healed.” ²⁹Immediately her bleeding stopped and she felt in her body that she was freed from her suffering.

³⁰At once Jesus realized that power had gone out from him. He turned around in the crowd and asked, “Who touched my clothes?”

³¹“You see the people crowding against you,” his disciples answered, “and yet you can ask, ‘Who touched me?’ ”

³²But Jesus kept looking around to see who had done it. ³³Then the woman, knowing what had happened to her, came and fell at his feet and, trembling with fear, told him the whole truth. ³⁴He said to her, “Daughter, your FAITH has healed you. Go in peace and be freed from your suffering.”

…Guys, its that simple. It’s that basic. It’s that glorious! You see, all of these people in the crowd were around Jesus and were touching him, but this woman was different. So how come something amazing didn’t happen when everyone else in the crowd touched Jesus? Because that woman was different, she was the one that had FAITH, and believed in her heart that Jesus could heal her after 12 years of menstrual bleeding. And she even had enough faith to say, “You know what, I bet I don’t even have to talk to him, I bet I can just barely touch the edge of his cloak! He wont even know… and that will be enough then I will be healed!” And guess what, because she knew that and actually had faith and believed it, Jesus did heal her. Wow there’s a shocker! Not really… Because how many times does Jesus say, “Your faith has healed you” …He says it a lot, or at least something very similar. So by that simple illustration we know that our faith can heal us. It can heal us from sin, it can heal us from hurt, it can heal us from illness. It can heal us from the misery of trying/having to control our own lives. All he wants us to do is dedicate our lives to him so that he can be glorified through our salvation and he wants to heal us. In Matthew 11:28 Jesus says, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. …He WANTS to give us rest, if we would just go to him!

I can not begin to think about how many times I have doubted God, or lacked faith in his will thinking that maybe I should take control over my own life. Maybe I shouldn’t burden God with my life and my troubles, I can find rest for myself, I’ll be alright. But that’s not what God wants for me, or for you. Does God not say that if we have faith in him he will take care of us? Then I don’t need to have control over my own life, God’s got me. He is the Lord of my life, and I will choose to let him be Lord over my life by simply putting my faith in his existence and that fact that he sent Jesus to die on the cross for my sins and then validate his righteousness by RISING FROM THE DEAD. WOAH! Is this real life? God loves me that much? You mean I don’t have to be in control of my own life after all? Because if he loves me that much then he must love me enough to have a plan for me right? Absolutely! A plan where I give him the glory by living my life for him, showing his love and living by that love in anyway, wherever I am, at anytime.

And all of that is simply done by having faith.

Let me simplify this for all of us even more: Jesus died on the cross for your sins, and the spirit of God raised him back to life for YOUR SALVATION. Let your FAITH in Jesus Christ heal you from whatever you are dealing with and give your life to God, for his glory, for his love, because of his love.

I challenge you to continue reading Mark 5 and see another example of someone having faith and believing in the power of Jesus.

God is faithful! Why are we surprised?

Tue, 31 Jan 2012 14:34:00 -0500

So… something amazing happened yesterday! But before I tell you about it I am going to talk about something that has been on my heart.

Why do we act surprised when God blesses us? Honestly, when he is faithful and answers our prayers why are we so shocked? The words, “You of little faith!” come to mind when I ask these questions.

Matthew 6:25-34 is a perfect example of scripture for what I am talking about.

25“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?

28 “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29 Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? 31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

This is a very common story from the Bible, and just like all scripture it can be applied in many ways. So how can we apply this? Jesus is telling us not to worry about our lives! And you say… Duh… but seriously, I know we have all heard this many times, “Don’t worry, Stop worrying it will be okay, Don’t stress about it God will help you!” We have all heard it or said those exact words to others to try and comfort them. But the reality is that we don’t listen, we don’t listen to each other and we don’t listen to Jesus. Jesus is the one telling us this, comforting us. But we defy our Savior! We still worry! That is the truth of the matter. Now how does that feel? Does it hurt? It hurts Jesus too, imagine how he feels having us ignore his promises. It hurts me to realize what I have done; I am so convicted by this! I am guilty of worrying. However by The Holy Spirit we can overcome this. In verse 30 Jesus asks “You of little faith?” but it isn’t really a question it is more like a conviction. We are of little faith, because we are worrying about silly things.

So now I will introduce my story. And I have been deciding whether or not to talk about the background of the story because I don’t want to come off as boasting, just like it happens to talk about in the other parts of Matthew 6, so I would just like you to know that I am not, if I could make the story make sense without it then I wouldn’t even bring it up. I am only telling you so that you can understand that God is amazing. And I mean, AMAZING.

Basically from reading the book Radical there was a part of the book that talked about and challenged people to give money in an additional way, and giving to the point where it became uncomfortable, because that is what God wants us to do. So I recently started giving portions of my money to an organization. However I had been struggling with what the proper amount would be due to the fact that I am trying to increase my savings account so that I can pay off my student loans as soon as possible. I had been trying to focus my faith on God, knowing that he would help me figure the best way to handle my loans and that HE WOULD BE FAITHFUL. I was focusing on not worrying and just seeking God and his will, having faith. A passage that came to mind was:

Matthew 7: 7-8

7 “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 8 For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened. …You can go read the rest of the passage, it is wonderful. In just those two verses is tells us how faithful God is. And so I was asking, seeking, and knocking for His will to be done.

Then it gets to the good part… my last pay check was not very good and I was struggling with whether or not to give the additional money because I wouldn’t be able to put any into savings from that check since I was taking a trip to Tulsa and was going to be spending more money than usual on myself. Then it hit me, the conviction of selfishness and earthly, sinful focus of money. I knew what the Lord would want me to do and I knew that He would be faithful to me if I wasn’t selfish. He tells us repeatedly: Don’t be selfish. Don’t love money. Give to those who need it. Give even when it hurts. Let the glory be to God. GLORY TO GOD. So I gave knowing it was Gods Will.

…So that was just this past weekend. Then yesterday it happened. I went to get my taxes done. (This is getting to be kind of lengthy so I’ll try and give you the short story.) Basically because I have a part time job and don’t make very much and have student loans I got a huge refund(in my opinion). Do you get it? DO YOU GET IT?! IT WAS THE LORD! It is no coincidence. No! I refuse to believe that and do not try to tell me otherwise. I knew in the deepest part of my soul that God is faithful and that He was blessing me with a large refund so that I can put it into saving for my loans!!

The second that I saw it I was like… Holy cow God is faithful!!! And then another revelation hit me! The revelation that ties it all together… Why was I surprised? Why was I shocked that God was faithful? Oh me of little faith! Does scripture not tell us not to worry, and tell us that God would take care of us! It does. And guess what? I didn’t worry and God took care of me! Does scripture not tell us that if we ask we will receive and if we seek we will find and that if we knock the door will be opened?! It does. And I asked, seeked, and knocked and guess what?! He is faithful!

Let’s go back to Matthew 6 again…

32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

…God knew what I needed and I searched for his kingdom and righteousness and didn’t worry and you know what?! That’s right I’m going to say it again… GOD IS FAITHFUL!!

Moral of the story: Seek God, Don’t worry, and God is FAITHFUL! We need to stop being surprised.

“Oh praise the one who paid my debt and raised this life...

Fri, 20 Jan 2012 15:26:52 -0500

“Oh praise the one who paid my debt and raised this life up from the dead…” — Jesus Paid It All

My current life.

Fri, 20 Jan 2012 14:54:49 -0500

(This is more for my benefit in the future, not necessarily because I expect others to care.)

What is my life about right now? Well.. I’m striving to make it about Jesus. I have gotten way too caught up in the idea of the American Dream and supporting myself and maybe a family some day. I got too stressed about “What is Gods will for my life?” like He was just going to give me a dream and in that dream tell me to be a massage therapist. Don’t get me wrong! I know God could do that if he wanted, He can do anything. But the fact is that I wasn’t really in-tune with what Gods will actually was. You see, we already know His will. He tells us repeatedly what His will for us is in the Bible. These things include: Giving to the poor, taking care of the needy and orphans, loving others, glorifying Him, and making disciples of all nations- baptizing them and teaching them about Jesus. All of these things are listed in scripture. And I have become painfully aware of the fact that they are not options… they are commands. And if we love the Lord with all of our heart, soul, and strength then we will follow His commandments. I’ve recently been big with reading Christian books, I’ve read Crazy Love and part of Forgotten God, both my Francis Chan and I’ve read the very convicting book Radical. Radical was a book written for me. I just know that David Platt had people just like me in mind when he was writing Radical. And after reading it my eyes have been opened to so many more truths that I have not previously recognized. I have also read a girls blog that has completely changed how I see a lot of others things all well, in her blog she wrote about the basics of our faith and the basics of things like Palm Sunday and Easter. Simple things that we don’t think enough about. That blog can be found at moisom.com

Basically what I am getting at is that I am currently going through a huge growing point in my life. I’m striving to glorify God in all that I do. Why? Well it’s simple… because He deserves it. He knew how sinful humans would be and after we screwed up and disobeyed him over and over again He still gave us another chance through Jesus Christ. Because of Jesus I am alive, and I owe God the glory from my life. So throughout school and work and helping in the youth group I am attempting at honoring our Lord and following His commandments. That is my current life.

Came across this song and absolutely love this band now!

Fri, 20 Jan 2012 14:30:29 -0500

Came across this song and absolutely love this band now!

Something I can't stop thinking about.

Sun, 18 Dec 2011 18:40:37 -0500

Christmas time: A time that we put up decorations, give gifts, and bake endless amounts of goodies. But has it always been like that?

But I’d like for us to go back to what Christmas is all about. For us to remember that someone, named Jesus, was sent from Heaven to Earth, born of a virgin, lived a perfect sinless life, and was crucified on a cross for our sins so that both Jews and Gentiles we would be saved and get to spend eternity in Heaven with a God who loves us.

Here’s my thought: The greatest gift that anyone can give to you, has already been given to you. It was sent by God and it was Jesus Christ dying on the cross so that your sins would be forgiven. So in light of Christmas traditions it is customary that when someone gives to a gift you normally also give them a gift in return… Here’s a story: A couple weeks ago a man came through the drive through at my work and asked one of our employees, “What are you getting Jesus for Christmas?” Later when she told me what he had said I was puzzled. I asked myself what I was getting Jesus for Christmas, and to be honest I had no idea what the answer was. So the past couple weeks I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it. Then today I came over this passage that I am sure many have heard and it gave me my answer. And to be honest I am disappointed I didn’t think of it immediately.

Matthew 25

The Sheep and the Goats

31“When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his throne in heavenly glory. 32All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. 33He will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left.

34“Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. 35For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, 36I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’

37“Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? 38When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? 39When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’

40“The King will reply, ‘I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.’

41“Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. 42For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, 43I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.’

44“They also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?’

45“He will reply, ‘I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’

46“Then they will go away to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life.”

“Christmas is an action, not a holiday.” Are you getting Jesus anything for Christmas?